Leadership Through Loss: Embracing Humanity While Leading Forward
by Jerome D. Ryans, President and CEO, Tampa Housing Authority
There are moments in leadership that no strategy, playbook, or professional development seminar prepares you for. Moments when the people you lead are carrying invisible burdens-grief, heartache, disorientation-and your responsibility is not simply to drive outcomes, but to lead with presence.
Recently, our community said goodbye to one of our most ardent allies, Tampa City Councilwoman Gwendolyn Henderson. Her passing leaves behind a legacy of tireless service and a deep void in our city's commitment to equity. At the same time, members of our own Tampa Housing Authority family have experienced personal loss-of beloved relatives, and yes, even pets, whose companionship offered comfort and constancy.
Loss, like leadership, is complex. It wears many faces. As leaders, we must learn to walk with it-both our own and that of our team. Over the years, I have learned that navigating loss while leading others is not a matter of balancing sorrow and responsibility-it is a matter of embracing both with intention. What follows are a few lessons I have come to understand, not only from personal experience, but from witnessing the quiet strength of others. My hope is that they will serve you as they have served me.
1. Acknowledge What Is Human Cannot Be Rushed
Leadership does not exempt us from grief. Nor does it make us immune to the sorrow felt by those around us. In moments of loss, we must first permit ourselves to be human. As it is written, there is a time to weep and a time to heal. You do not need to have all the answers. You need to be present. Let your team see that sorrow has a place in your leadership-not as weakness, but as witness.
2. Model Stillness and Permission
Often, staff feel pressure to "push through" their pain for the sake of performance. When we, as leaders, recognize the emotional realities in the room-through a note, a conversation, or simply a pause in a meeting-we send a powerful message: You are not expected to grieve in silence. Whether someone has lost a parent or a pet, they have lost something irreplaceable. Acknowledgement dignifies that loss.
3. Hold Space, Then Guide Forward
One of the most enduring teachings in ancient wisdom literature is that mourning is not a disruption of life-it is part of the rhythm of life. But we are also reminded to rise, to walk again. After the grieving has begun, our role becomes one of gentle guidance: helping our teams make meaning, reestablish hope, and return to their purpose with clarity.
4. Reframe the Mission, Renew the Why
When someone close to us passes, we often re-examine what matters. Organizations are no different. Moments of collective sorrow can become turning points-opportunities to reaffirm our mission, our commitment, and our vision. I have found that people do not lose motivation during hard times-they simply need to be reminded that their work is still sacred.
5. Be the Calm, Not the Answer
In the wake of loss, resist the urge to fix what cannot be fixed. Instead, be the calm. Offer steadiness, not solutions. A leader's role is not to erase pain, but to help others carry it until they can walk forward on their own. Compassion, consistency, and even silence can often say more than words.
6. Honor the Legacy
Whenever possible, honor those who have passed. Share stories. Celebrate their impact. We are not only the stewards of results-we are stewards of memory. Our mission to provide safe, affordable housing is built upon the efforts of those who came before us. It is right to remember them and carry their torch forward.
In closing, if you are leading while grieving, know this: you are not alone. The road is not always linear, and the weight may shift, but the calling remains. Lead with grace. Lead with heart. Above all, lead knowing that even in mourning, you are still lighting the way.
Let us continue to hold each other up and lead with a spirit that both embraces our humanity and uplifts our shared purpose.
